Pangkor Woes & Bitchslap Me Baby!

My Coral Island trip was toss,

because the water was murky

there were all these touristy people floating around

trying to snorkel with their life-jackets on.

As If!

So then I just mucked around until it was time to explore Pangkor Island.

See, I may know Pangkor Laut like the back of my hand

but I know nuts about Pangkor.

Depressing

is what it was...

We borrowed a moped

it took 20 mins or so to tour the island

and it is a beautiful island,

all that hilly verdant greenery

but when we reached the tourist/backpacker areas

I wanted to weep in despair

15 stores, each selling the same generic shit

tacky motels

6 Ramly burgers

all side-by-side

there were only a handful of ang-moh tourists

the bulk was made up of locals enjoying the long weekend

What if Pangkor was their only stop?

Is this the impression that they will bear of Malaysia when they return?

The ang-mohs looked miserable and lost

I don't blame them

what a fucking shithole

It was beyond embarrasing.

I wanted to personally apologise to them for being misled

to thinking Pangkor was more than it was

I was so sad.

Fucking advertising lies.

God, don't we do that with penang too?

All the photo-editing to make and beach and ocean look more pristine?

To lure tourists,

and fool them into thinking more of what is essentially crappy?

Depressing.

So, says I

"Lets go to the Dutch Fort, I'm feeling suicidal here"

The reply I got was something akin to

"The Dutch Fort will push you over the edge"

But we went, for a laugh.

It was the epitome of a cheap tourist gimmick.

*cringe*

I can't go into it, might slit my wrists.

Even the Batu Bersurat was like, so not-taken-care-of ok?

Like, no signs, (except for "Batu Bersurat/ Historical Rock")

Where are the explanations as to why, how, when?

Come on man.

My only consolation was that this kind of thing happens everywhere.

Every country has

crappy tourist traps

that even the locals would never think to set foot upon.

_____________________________

One thing Pangkor does have though,

is a damn good hair salon,

where the wash your hair

give you a 30 minute back massage

wash, massage your face

rinse & blow (your hair idiot)

all for 10 ringgit.

Its like over an hour of pampering ok?

I made the mistake

of telling them to trim the hair at the nape

and she cut and cut and cut

and me being in my depressed mode

I just let her

and now

its so freaking bad that

I avoid looking at myself in the mirror

I just don't want to know anymore.

____________________

On a lighter note,

I was feeling my arse just now

(no, I don't make it a habit of feeling my own arse up, I was moisturizing)

And you know what?

its damn firm okay

Must be all that walking, hiking and blading

* Piackkkk*