Hot Like Duck

This heat is mad.
This heat is ridiculous.
This heat is unbearable.

HOT

Sweltering, scorching
maddeningly so.

The 4 men and I are lunching
on roasted duck & pork

'I'm so damn hot my thighs are sweating!'
(indeed they are uncomfortably slick with sweat)

The men look up.

'I think if I got up, there would be a puddle of sweat on my chair.'

Boss 1: In some places, like Japan, that would be a turn on.

'Well thank god we're not in Japan then.'

Boss 1: Yeah, it's called 'Puddle Sex'.

Gabe begins to tell us that before he goes to the US
they will stop in Japan for 2 days.

'Where in Japan?'

'I don't know, some place with an airport probably'.

Asking for it man...kena suan gila.

'Fuckin Ell, genius, somewhere with an airport?'

We move on, the men start to talk about a friend who frequents
our office, and his latest endeavour
he is a jack-of-all-trades

I'm not his biggest fan
because:
1) he leaves stools the length of mineral water bottles
at the bottom of our toilet bowl
2) He has a problem with BO
(as in has a bad case of it, not cannot tahan people with a bad case of it)
3) He always says "Wah you put on so much weight"
to me as soon as he walks in the door.

Fucker.

So anyways, we chat about him and his jobs
Boss 2 looks up

"Name me one thing he isn't doing?"

Aja: Buying deodarant!

Aaron: Girls!

Obviously, Aaron won.
Dammit.