The fact that I leave home in 5 days
and have so much left to do
so many people to see
is just physically and emotionally draining
at the risk of sounding like an unappreciative bitch
I just can't wait til this week is over
and I am on that plane

I've never experienced stress levels like these
and it's just packing
and fitting things into the social schedules
gosh, who knew?

never had headaches in my life,
yet here they are, every night, relentless in the morning
tonight though, I said 'fuck that'
and zapped it with a
superstrongmakesyousohigh kinda painkiller
wish it worked as well for affairs of the heart

On Monday, I said my first goodbye
on top of a mountain swirling with mist
I gave Petes a hug, we said the usual 'take care' s
then we stepped back, hugged again
my aunt stood to the side, watching us,
then promptly burst into tears herself

"No crying!" yelled I,

"If I am like this now, how will I be at the airport?"
she said, yet pulled herself together
we drove down the mountain
and later in the town of Ipoh
over silky rice noodles and succulent chicken
I said goodbye to Joe

'No crying', 'No goodbyes', 'No emo bullshit'
has been my mantra

Cubed tells me that I will have to face it eventually
I nod 'I know'
he thinks I will bawl like a baby at the airport
but I know myself better
I will cry when everyone else has
when I turn my back, and am alone
that's when, that's me.

The next day, I went around to the old office,
collected my last cheque, my files, my coffee mug
then I said goodbye, a-bloody-gain

Fastforwarding isn't even an option


I haven't blogged mainly because I
see no joy in spreading my misery
Then the lacking time thing is a super big factor
I asked Frou and Cubed to guestblog but they said
'Too much pressure'

Also, I wanted to blog about the holiday before
all this I'm going away stuff
oh well. Too bad.
Pics up as and when time permits.

Tonight people, Bagan, 10.30, 11 ish
Do come cos its my last night out in Penang
everyone is invited
to come buy me a drink (;