Dear Diary,

Today I feel as though I am walking
around with my head in a glass fishbowl
(swimming around, in a fish bowl, year after year)
I'm coughing and feverish and my chest feels like a
half-empty (thump thump)
drum filled with phlegm

I feel like a bat's bunghole.

All I want to do is bury my head in the sand and die
But on the upside,
I'm really glad that I have people to
at least call and text to see if I'm okay
yes, even the indian-givers
Thank you.