I do it like a pro.
Today my Monday is made even Moodier
with the presence of a hangover
within me.
at 1.30 pm yesterday
I was a lump of flesh and bone
wrapped head to toe
in my queen-sized t-shirt material comforter
ensconed in the warm softness of my bed
with 5 pillows and a bolster pressed up against
various parts of my body
as if I was a completely separate entity
I watched one hand as it snaked slowly out
from the tiniest gap
in the bottom of the mound of cotton,
searching blindly for the remote
turned of the a/c with a sharp beep
and there I wallowed til the heat
became too much to bear.
The day was flawless.
When I called May and said 'lets go to the beach'
I envisioned a day of simple, back-to-nature fun
a stroll in the Spice Gardens
a coffee and a book at the cafe overlooking the ocean
basking in the sun on stretch of sand opposite
May suggested the pool at the Parkroyal
"25 bucks and we get a towel, use the pool and
redeem on food(what she really meant was alcohol)"
"Babe, I have a pool at my place,
we may as well stay here, I wanted to drive up to a beach
not a hotel"
Her argument was there got
people to watch, bar, etc.
In the end I relented, no toilet
bla bla bla
no alcohol
etc etc etc
and I ended up spending way more than I could afford
(as happens very often when with may)
and this girl says she can live on a farm, you believe her ah?
The problem with May is
she earns twice what I earn
so she can spend more
but to keep up with her,
I have to starve the last half of the month
and after yesterday, I will.
The Parkroyal Beach Bar
is goddamn motherfucking incredibly expensive
32 bucks for a beer
that they serve in a plastic mug
thank god I dont drink beer.
But I guess considering the company
the great laughs
and so called intellectual
discussions on life
the bitching
and the double lobster thermidor dinner
and endless glasses of wine after
the beautiful sunset
the sea breeze
the on/off showers that the flawless day gave into
and the smell of horseshit that permeated the bar,
it was a day worth starving for.
I'm not to sure about this hangover being worth it though.
The word of the day, thanks to Tim the Puppy
is Shank
which is, a shit and a wank
at the same time
talk about the ultimate release
"I'm all shanked out"
Today my Monday is made even Moodier
with the presence of a hangover
within me.
at 1.30 pm yesterday
I was a lump of flesh and bone
wrapped head to toe
in my queen-sized t-shirt material comforter
ensconed in the warm softness of my bed
with 5 pillows and a bolster pressed up against
various parts of my body
as if I was a completely separate entity
I watched one hand as it snaked slowly out
from the tiniest gap
in the bottom of the mound of cotton,
searching blindly for the remote
turned of the a/c with a sharp beep
and there I wallowed til the heat
became too much to bear.
The day was flawless.
When I called May and said 'lets go to the beach'
I envisioned a day of simple, back-to-nature fun
a stroll in the Spice Gardens
a coffee and a book at the cafe overlooking the ocean
basking in the sun on stretch of sand opposite
May suggested the pool at the Parkroyal
"25 bucks and we get a towel, use the pool and
redeem on food(what she really meant was alcohol)"
"Babe, I have a pool at my place,
we may as well stay here, I wanted to drive up to a beach
not a hotel"
Her argument was there got
people to watch, bar, etc.
In the end I relented, no toilet
bla bla bla
no alcohol
etc etc etc
and I ended up spending way more than I could afford
(as happens very often when with may)
and this girl says she can live on a farm, you believe her ah?
The problem with May is
she earns twice what I earn
so she can spend more
but to keep up with her,
I have to starve the last half of the month
and after yesterday, I will.
The Parkroyal Beach Bar
is goddamn motherfucking incredibly expensive
32 bucks for a beer
that they serve in a plastic mug
thank god I dont drink beer.
But I guess considering the company
the great laughs
and so called intellectual
discussions on life
the bitching
and the double lobster thermidor dinner
and endless glasses of wine after
the beautiful sunset
the sea breeze
the on/off showers that the flawless day gave into
and the smell of horseshit that permeated the bar,
it was a day worth starving for.
I'm not to sure about this hangover being worth it though.
The word of the day, thanks to Tim the Puppy
is Shank
which is, a shit and a wank
at the same time
talk about the ultimate release
"I'm all shanked out"
7 comments:
Look on the bright side:
At least you don't have any side effects from chili con carne to go with the hangover. Do you?
*cabut*
I had a beautiful Monday.
Im having a Dilbert Monday...
:(
Try having a shart where you think you're farting but shit comes out too...while you're breazing by the shelves of MPH.
Is turtles head like prairy doggin?
Coz I'm talking about old faithful. The uncle who related this story to 40 over people after dinner was drunk at the time. The funny thing is he told the same story a couple of days later but this time he was sober. I worship this guy.
Hallelujah!!! Anyway I got the prairy doggin thing from the movie Rat Race. I didn't get it at first until, as fate would have it, animal planet did a little do on prairy dogs.
Btw, how the hell did we digress from Monday to phrases related to crap.
"The maid came in" - me don't geddit.
Post a Comment