Boilermen

YM is in the kitchen with me
When he thinks no one is looking, he comes up close to my ear and whispers

“ Do not leave me alone with dees people, zey will take me roughly in their van!”

His accent is german, and this is Dieter, a neurotic suicidal man;
one of his best characters.

Dieter always makes me laugh.

I throw my head back,giggle;
instantly four pairs of eyes snap towards me.

There is nothing more flattering than having your boiler replaced.
The boiler in your home I mean.

First there is the man who comes to drop the new boiler off.
“Morning, my lovely,” he says, tipping his cap.

The next morning, a group of 4 men come in early
and stay the whole day.

Its is a steady chorus of ‘dear’ ‘lovely’ and the like
In fact you could be doing something in the kitchen and turn and find a
young, strapping lad quickly lower his eyes from watching you.

Or you could walk down the hall and say good morning
and render another dumbfounded for a moment.
They work extra hard and seem to not mind
staying late.

Then the next morning comes the electrician who calls you a ‘pretty lass’
and seems sorry that his job is quick and simple, and done.

Tomorrow I will wake, snug and warm in this now automatically heated
home, and the attention will be like a dream, gone.